i feel like my creative juices have been sucked dry the last few weeks. as you can tell from my posts (or lack thereof), i have been kinda discouraged lately. i feel like i broke it a couple of days ago and things have been clicking again.
you know how you get stuck in a rut and things get so narrow. i have been feeling very suffocated lately, even after moving and working so hard. just recently i have been able to think about things big picture again, and that is cool.
the idea of having dreams that span beyond a neighborhood and enter the international realm are really exciting. i wish i had more money because i have a lot of ideas :)
subject change, kind of... i want a more routine life. anyone have any ideas? i definitely need to wake up earlier, i think my day would feel much better. i have ideas of reading more and resting more but i can not get rested right now because i feel i have so much i need to do. my life is too hectic, it is hard to accomplish my simple goals of getting outdoors more and investing more time into music and other creative mediums when i feel like i have to work all the time.
yikes, this life stuff is crazy, the day i feel like i have it all together, something will happen to shake it up. i love life.
peace yall
Thursday, July 28, 2005
promise
i will write something tonight. been running around all week and haven't had much chance to do much of any writing.
my mind is a bit clogged anyway.
my mind is a bit clogged anyway.
Friday, July 22, 2005
swamped...
well,
been a bit swamped lately. i will have time to write something tomorrow or saturday...
it's been really hot out here as well, kinda makes you slow down. though i did go for a nice trail run tonight, yikes, will take a while to hydrate and recover again :)
oh, my desk is almost done at the house, so i wll have a place to put stuff again. then pictures, i promise
ericj.
been a bit swamped lately. i will have time to write something tomorrow or saturday...
it's been really hot out here as well, kinda makes you slow down. though i did go for a nice trail run tonight, yikes, will take a while to hydrate and recover again :)
oh, my desk is almost done at the house, so i wll have a place to put stuff again. then pictures, i promise
ericj.
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
1 of my 43 things
i have been having a problem with snoozing lately. i need to start getting up right when my alarm clocks goes off. it is easy if i have something to get too.
See more progress on: wake up when my alarm clock goes off
Saturday, July 16, 2005
desire
was watching good will hunting with my cousins last night and it made me think... uh-oh
i think a lot of people are like will hunting, they have this incredible drive to avoid change. i would say i am normally like that, but i also know what it feels like to ditch everything you know and change your life completely. i flipped my life last year and it wasn't a disaster, it wasn't perfect either. i would say the only thing i know is that it wasn't easy, but it was way way worth it. i am still picking up the pieces, life can be awkward with change because you don't know what you are getting.
i was asked fairly recently if i could do it again? start over. well, i could (but not for a while cause i don't have the cash stash to start over) but i am not going to do it alone. i actually enjoy it a bit. you get to start completely fresh. it can be frustrating, but it might just be worth it.
will hunting was scared to let people in, abandonment, rejection whatever. he relied on his head and not his heart. how normal for people in general, you get burned a couple of times so you no longer try it again. will did not know what he actually wanted, he just lived what he knew. he avoided change because he could not control it if he pursued it... but is life worth only living in what we know?
so the question i got to thinking about is, 'what do you really want?' seriously, stop reading this crap and actually think about it, but simplify it to only 'one' thing. go.
-----------
what came to your mind? i imagine the first couple things that came to your mind was something about god and intimacy? or a good life? or contentment? i had those thoughts too, because i think we are trained to answer it that way. avoid the money, wealth thing because that is selfish, avoid the fame because that is shallow. hit the god thing because that is what we are 'supposed' to think or guilt pushes us to think that way (don't take this the wrong way, it may just the best answer, but i think alot of us think of this answer through guilt of not living it now).
here is my answer... i think i want to connect with one person on a soul level where when i am in the pits, that is the one person i want to go to (or can handle)... or when i accomplish something huge, she would be the first person i would want to tell. i would give up wealth, comfort, ease just so i could have some girl to desire and desire me.
don't get me wrong, i do desire to grow close to god, to have this intimacy with him. but the problem is i don't think we physically can on earth. we were created to be consumed by god, right? but with the whole fall, we are physically separated from the creator (by creation, well skewed creation) and can only return to that when we return to the actual state we were created for. (why we have to take this earth step, i don't really know?) is my philosophy even correct? i don't know, but god desires us to journey towards him every single day of our lives, so we can have a piece of what will come.
but i am just not convinced that we can have that actual, real consuming feeling with god on earth. it is almost as if we just get glimpses of it to give us hope and to push on. the journey is the blessing, but the end will come when we live in the true presence of god.
so that leaves me to think that the one thing i want is vulnerability and intimacy with some girl (perfect for me) on earth. that that would be the ultimate glimpse of what is really coming for us because that is the ultimate one thing that we can actually comprehend here.?
that doesn't mean i am desperate at all, nor does it mean that it is the only thing that consumes me, but really, what else is more important than relationships and there are only a few relationships that can mimic what god created us for, himself.
am i wrong here? do i have it flipped, should the one thing that i really desire be intimacy with god? let the things here take second? any thoughts? did the thomas mertons, richard fosters, pauls, peters, bonhoffers, rich mullenses, brendan mannings, lewises, moodys, luthers, francaises.. did they really feel consumed by god?
its hot in denver and i am just rambling. hope you all are having a good day.
ericj.
i think a lot of people are like will hunting, they have this incredible drive to avoid change. i would say i am normally like that, but i also know what it feels like to ditch everything you know and change your life completely. i flipped my life last year and it wasn't a disaster, it wasn't perfect either. i would say the only thing i know is that it wasn't easy, but it was way way worth it. i am still picking up the pieces, life can be awkward with change because you don't know what you are getting.
i was asked fairly recently if i could do it again? start over. well, i could (but not for a while cause i don't have the cash stash to start over) but i am not going to do it alone. i actually enjoy it a bit. you get to start completely fresh. it can be frustrating, but it might just be worth it.
will hunting was scared to let people in, abandonment, rejection whatever. he relied on his head and not his heart. how normal for people in general, you get burned a couple of times so you no longer try it again. will did not know what he actually wanted, he just lived what he knew. he avoided change because he could not control it if he pursued it... but is life worth only living in what we know?
so the question i got to thinking about is, 'what do you really want?' seriously, stop reading this crap and actually think about it, but simplify it to only 'one' thing. go.
-----------
what came to your mind? i imagine the first couple things that came to your mind was something about god and intimacy? or a good life? or contentment? i had those thoughts too, because i think we are trained to answer it that way. avoid the money, wealth thing because that is selfish, avoid the fame because that is shallow. hit the god thing because that is what we are 'supposed' to think or guilt pushes us to think that way (don't take this the wrong way, it may just the best answer, but i think alot of us think of this answer through guilt of not living it now).
here is my answer... i think i want to connect with one person on a soul level where when i am in the pits, that is the one person i want to go to (or can handle)... or when i accomplish something huge, she would be the first person i would want to tell. i would give up wealth, comfort, ease just so i could have some girl to desire and desire me.
don't get me wrong, i do desire to grow close to god, to have this intimacy with him. but the problem is i don't think we physically can on earth. we were created to be consumed by god, right? but with the whole fall, we are physically separated from the creator (by creation, well skewed creation) and can only return to that when we return to the actual state we were created for. (why we have to take this earth step, i don't really know?) is my philosophy even correct? i don't know, but god desires us to journey towards him every single day of our lives, so we can have a piece of what will come.
but i am just not convinced that we can have that actual, real consuming feeling with god on earth. it is almost as if we just get glimpses of it to give us hope and to push on. the journey is the blessing, but the end will come when we live in the true presence of god.
so that leaves me to think that the one thing i want is vulnerability and intimacy with some girl (perfect for me) on earth. that that would be the ultimate glimpse of what is really coming for us because that is the ultimate one thing that we can actually comprehend here.?
that doesn't mean i am desperate at all, nor does it mean that it is the only thing that consumes me, but really, what else is more important than relationships and there are only a few relationships that can mimic what god created us for, himself.
am i wrong here? do i have it flipped, should the one thing that i really desire be intimacy with god? let the things here take second? any thoughts? did the thomas mertons, richard fosters, pauls, peters, bonhoffers, rich mullenses, brendan mannings, lewises, moodys, luthers, francaises.. did they really feel consumed by god?
its hot in denver and i am just rambling. hope you all are having a good day.
ericj.
Tuesday, July 12, 2005
inspiration?
well, i guess it has been one of those weeks. you know, where you are pretty busy with life and just uninspired to be very creative. i have this desire to have all this important life changing philosophical stuff to say... about all these deep, meaningful thoughts that are constantly passing through my brain (yeah right) but when you dont have a lot of deep, meaningful things to think about or you ignore them to think about the busyness you have to take on, things get kinda hum drum.
i did get a chance to finish a good book the other night (albeit, pretty late) and it had to do with the whole struggle between 'we' i.e. community (soft end) or communism (hard end) vs. 'i' i.e. creative freedoms (soft end) versus selfish gain (hard end). the book (anthem, by ayn rand) comes from a completely opposite upbringing but is really thought provoking.
here was my realization, ayn rand grew up in communist russia and wrote about how true liberation is through the self (communism-- hard end vs. creative freedoms (soft end). i grew up in a complete capitolistic society and am constantly trying to incorporate community into my life (selfish gain -- hard end vs. community -- soft end). interesting. i can understand why she would write soo much about the necessity for personal freedom. i really think if she lived in a society like ours, she would almost write the opposite story... at least i would.
it is a good read, you should read it. about 120 pages, pretty quick. makes you think about how oppressive communist russia really was because community and the 'we' sense of solidarity are really quite powerful, impressive, and honestly... appealing. but the book really shuns a lot of socialist viewpoints for the sake that her experience (guess) was so rigid.
i read about how she feels the individual is the 'god,' and i think that is crap. but, coming from her background, maybe it isn't meant to be *that* strong, maybe the individual (even just a little creative self freedom) is powerful and beautiful.
even though the book was a bit extreme for my socialist tendancies, the end has a great point about using the individual mind instead of relying on the collective. i wish there was more thought about using the heart, which can include some collective yet adding personal creativitly for the ultimate good of both self and society than relying totally on the self mind to conquer all problems.
yikes, i guess i did have a little bit of creative juices in my head, probably doesnt make much sense though.
have a good day.
i did get a chance to finish a good book the other night (albeit, pretty late) and it had to do with the whole struggle between 'we' i.e. community (soft end) or communism (hard end) vs. 'i' i.e. creative freedoms (soft end) versus selfish gain (hard end). the book (anthem, by ayn rand) comes from a completely opposite upbringing but is really thought provoking.
here was my realization, ayn rand grew up in communist russia and wrote about how true liberation is through the self (communism-- hard end vs. creative freedoms (soft end). i grew up in a complete capitolistic society and am constantly trying to incorporate community into my life (selfish gain -- hard end vs. community -- soft end). interesting. i can understand why she would write soo much about the necessity for personal freedom. i really think if she lived in a society like ours, she would almost write the opposite story... at least i would.
it is a good read, you should read it. about 120 pages, pretty quick. makes you think about how oppressive communist russia really was because community and the 'we' sense of solidarity are really quite powerful, impressive, and honestly... appealing. but the book really shuns a lot of socialist viewpoints for the sake that her experience (guess) was so rigid.
i read about how she feels the individual is the 'god,' and i think that is crap. but, coming from her background, maybe it isn't meant to be *that* strong, maybe the individual (even just a little creative self freedom) is powerful and beautiful.
even though the book was a bit extreme for my socialist tendancies, the end has a great point about using the individual mind instead of relying on the collective. i wish there was more thought about using the heart, which can include some collective yet adding personal creativitly for the ultimate good of both self and society than relying totally on the self mind to conquer all problems.
yikes, i guess i did have a little bit of creative juices in my head, probably doesnt make much sense though.
have a good day.
Friday, July 08, 2005
writer's block
i am just uninspired to write anything right now. maybe it is the heat. regardless, i may bubble up enough steam to do some writing tonight. maybe not.
i gots myself a busy weekend too.
i gots myself a busy weekend too.
Monday, July 04, 2005
reading and poetry
well, let me ask you all a question. i have never been much of a reader and i am interested in learning. how can you lose the anxiety of doing something else when you are reading? that's the big question. it is really difficult for me just to read books and what not. i get into a few every now and again and blaze through them. i love reading at airports and at coffee shops. maybe i should just do that, go to airports and coffee shops to get my reading fix.
but how do you live a more simplified life as a reader and have to go to a coffee house everytime i want to read? that doesn't seem like an analogous pattern. maybe it is.
golden doesn't offer much in the way of late night non-bar hang outs. well see, this whole move, simplification process is new to me. lots to learn.
tonight, i did have a great time just chill'n with some friends (neighbors actually) just around the way. we just chatted, ate, and read poetry. i really liked it, kinda like what we did back in the day before bars were the major source for social activities.
on that same line of thought, i have been thinking quite a bit about living in community of sorts. dont know how that is going to play out either because proximity community will not work since i just bought a condo, and it is fairly small. but the ideas behind community (shared lives) really appeals to me lately and i want to live it out a bit. all this stuff is just at the beginning stages but i really feel like my life will be radically different in a few years.
i think i might be the only realtor in the whole world that actually doesn't care about making tons of money and actually enjoys living in smaller spaces close to neighbors and friends. i think the american dream (crap if you ask me) is to get that big house far from your neighbors. bah, community is better.
i say that now without kids, i suppose that thought process might change, but really, is that all necessary? i have never been a white picket fence kinda guy, i actually enjoy neighborhoods with some diversity of sorts. i think schools will be a big deal for me, but i aint gonna worry about that now :)
-----------
change of topic really quick. we were chatting tonight about some music and what not and we were listening to jack johnson. one of my peeps mentioned that she loved this certain song because it makes her think of love. i think that is really cool. that happen to you? i know it does to me. i have those songs that i love to listen to because they put in a me a longing, a longing for something else. i suppose it might be love but its the longing the creates that feeling.
peace
but how do you live a more simplified life as a reader and have to go to a coffee house everytime i want to read? that doesn't seem like an analogous pattern. maybe it is.
golden doesn't offer much in the way of late night non-bar hang outs. well see, this whole move, simplification process is new to me. lots to learn.
tonight, i did have a great time just chill'n with some friends (neighbors actually) just around the way. we just chatted, ate, and read poetry. i really liked it, kinda like what we did back in the day before bars were the major source for social activities.
on that same line of thought, i have been thinking quite a bit about living in community of sorts. dont know how that is going to play out either because proximity community will not work since i just bought a condo, and it is fairly small. but the ideas behind community (shared lives) really appeals to me lately and i want to live it out a bit. all this stuff is just at the beginning stages but i really feel like my life will be radically different in a few years.
i think i might be the only realtor in the whole world that actually doesn't care about making tons of money and actually enjoys living in smaller spaces close to neighbors and friends. i think the american dream (crap if you ask me) is to get that big house far from your neighbors. bah, community is better.
i say that now without kids, i suppose that thought process might change, but really, is that all necessary? i have never been a white picket fence kinda guy, i actually enjoy neighborhoods with some diversity of sorts. i think schools will be a big deal for me, but i aint gonna worry about that now :)
-----------
change of topic really quick. we were chatting tonight about some music and what not and we were listening to jack johnson. one of my peeps mentioned that she loved this certain song because it makes her think of love. i think that is really cool. that happen to you? i know it does to me. i have those songs that i love to listen to because they put in a me a longing, a longing for something else. i suppose it might be love but its the longing the creates that feeling.
peace
Thursday, June 30, 2005
as per miss mary in chi
hmmm... this is a very quick list. i have about 5 minutes before my battery runs out. i am at paris on the platte and i dont have my cord with me :(
1. music, i love music. especially not so mainstream stuff
2. ski/snowboard stuff
3. jackets... mmmm, jackets
4. shoes (see 3), size 10.5 or so depending on the brand
5. my subaru wrx
6. food, restaurants
7. outdoor activities, running, hiking, camping, biking. i am slowly turning into a gearhead out here in colorado
8. a better laptop with more battery power
9. an ipod, i need one
battery is going... will think more later and maybe add/change tomorrow.
1. music, i love music. especially not so mainstream stuff
2. ski/snowboard stuff
3. jackets... mmmm, jackets
4. shoes (see 3), size 10.5 or so depending on the brand
5. my subaru wrx
6. food, restaurants
7. outdoor activities, running, hiking, camping, biking. i am slowly turning into a gearhead out here in colorado
8. a better laptop with more battery power
9. an ipod, i need one
battery is going... will think more later and maybe add/change tomorrow.
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
more simplification
i had an great conversation last evening where i was able to dialog about life with this guy, Paul, who is willing to listen to my babbling and opinionated snidities(new word). two pronounced ideas have been floating through my mind last evening and into today from that conversation. those being: monestaries and the cat theory.
so, i have stated to a couple of people that i really am trying to strip my life down to a more simplified way of living. less dependance on the things that make me anxious. i have not been able to go to my house and just be ok with sitting and doing something as simple as reading. i always feel i need to be doing something or worse, i flip on the tv to avoid that feeling.
my goal is to really be comfortable with silence and solitude and all the good things that come with that so my heart can be more at rest and more importantly, my relationship with God can be more real and personal. i want to be able to enjoy simple pleasures, not be anxious for something next.
with those thoughts came the idea of a monestary. Paul knew of some friends that took a week off and went to a monestary in New Mexico to live in solitude. i really dont remember what came out of that trip for those people, i might not have been told. but i do know that that idea sparked in me a desire for the same type of thing. my vacations are full up for the year, so i am trying it with 'baby steps' over the next few months and maybe next year will be able to do something more drastic. so we will see how it goes. i know journaling/blogging is a good first step in the simplification process, it requires me to spend time with my thoughts and jot them down for the unsuspecting world to read. that is good. now i just need to get more 'in tuned' with myself.
which... brings me to my second topic; cat theory. it has come to my attention (though it has been a revelation for me for quite sometime) that i am way more of a cat than a dog. (quickly, cat and dog theory goes that cats are independant and rely on themselves, they are god. dogs are dependant and rely on their masters). it was asked of me why i really believe in God on a truly personal level... quite honestly it was hard to answer that question. i guess i have not asked that question of myself for quite sometime and thoughts were swimming in my mind about just being taught it. i ended up giving the somewhat cop-out answer of just knowing it in my core. i mean, it is the truth, i trust it in my core, but not having a somewhat logical answer drives me crazy.
without that dependance on God, it is a struggle to really have an answer to why i believe in the things i do. with this whole religion/relationship stuff, the more honest you are with yourself that you really are nothing (yet mean everything to God) and being dependant on That which knows what is best for you, the more of a dog you become (in a purely complementary way). dogs are anxious for only their masters while cats play with that which is infront of them then quicly passes it off when it gets bored. hmmm
just some thoughts. maybe i will expand more later, have to finish lunch and get back to work.
so, i have stated to a couple of people that i really am trying to strip my life down to a more simplified way of living. less dependance on the things that make me anxious. i have not been able to go to my house and just be ok with sitting and doing something as simple as reading. i always feel i need to be doing something or worse, i flip on the tv to avoid that feeling.
my goal is to really be comfortable with silence and solitude and all the good things that come with that so my heart can be more at rest and more importantly, my relationship with God can be more real and personal. i want to be able to enjoy simple pleasures, not be anxious for something next.
with those thoughts came the idea of a monestary. Paul knew of some friends that took a week off and went to a monestary in New Mexico to live in solitude. i really dont remember what came out of that trip for those people, i might not have been told. but i do know that that idea sparked in me a desire for the same type of thing. my vacations are full up for the year, so i am trying it with 'baby steps' over the next few months and maybe next year will be able to do something more drastic. so we will see how it goes. i know journaling/blogging is a good first step in the simplification process, it requires me to spend time with my thoughts and jot them down for the unsuspecting world to read. that is good. now i just need to get more 'in tuned' with myself.
which... brings me to my second topic; cat theory. it has come to my attention (though it has been a revelation for me for quite sometime) that i am way more of a cat than a dog. (quickly, cat and dog theory goes that cats are independant and rely on themselves, they are god. dogs are dependant and rely on their masters). it was asked of me why i really believe in God on a truly personal level... quite honestly it was hard to answer that question. i guess i have not asked that question of myself for quite sometime and thoughts were swimming in my mind about just being taught it. i ended up giving the somewhat cop-out answer of just knowing it in my core. i mean, it is the truth, i trust it in my core, but not having a somewhat logical answer drives me crazy.
without that dependance on God, it is a struggle to really have an answer to why i believe in the things i do. with this whole religion/relationship stuff, the more honest you are with yourself that you really are nothing (yet mean everything to God) and being dependant on That which knows what is best for you, the more of a dog you become (in a purely complementary way). dogs are anxious for only their masters while cats play with that which is infront of them then quicly passes it off when it gets bored. hmmm
just some thoughts. maybe i will expand more later, have to finish lunch and get back to work.
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
shoes
oh...
i have too many shoes. any suggestions on how to better organize them or arrange them in a way to maximize space and accessibility (i lost closet space). any suggestions would help besides the obvious 'get rid of some shoes' suggestion.
that goes for jackets too. dont have a hallway closet anymore. i have never been a seasonal packer, school me please.
i have too many shoes. any suggestions on how to better organize them or arrange them in a way to maximize space and accessibility (i lost closet space). any suggestions would help besides the obvious 'get rid of some shoes' suggestion.
that goes for jackets too. dont have a hallway closet anymore. i have never been a seasonal packer, school me please.
i now have a commute
so, i went from a 10 minute commute to a 15 minute communte. i suppose it could go up to 20-25 minutes if i have bad traffice, but it is worth it. ha, ha... the funny thing is that i dont even think those numbers constitute a bad commute. it is ridiculous how denver (being 3 mil or so) is soo easy to get around in.
going from a 1 and 1/2 hour commute using 2 different cars and a train in chicago to driving alongside a nice plateau of rock and trees for most of my commute creates in a me a much happier mood... so much better in clearing the mind.
almost all moved in. just have my bedroom to complete. cant really do it until i get my computer desk (which i have to find one first). then my room and life will be complete :).
about the whole simplification process... it is going pretty well. i am choosing to put most of my things in the garage and then deciding at that point whether i should bring it in the house/use it. alot of my clutter will be out of site, which will help with me focus in on what's important. i still have too much furniture and it is pretty crappy, but hey, one thing at a time.
so, another of my goals in this moving process is to get more outside. i will tell you it is soo much easier to get outside when i am in Golden. everyday (at least the first) i see the foothills that literally surround me and i am refreshed. i do miss east colfax (most people would think that statement is funny, it is like saying they miss all the crap that comes from living in the city, but honestly, that is why i like cities... the crap) and all the 24 hour diners that come with the hustle and bustle. oh well. it was like 9:30 and it was completely (and i mean completely) quiet in my neighborhood, very weird. it is going to take some time to get used to that.
but, on the good side, i already ran into someone i know running in Golden on my first night at the house. that was really cool.
ok, gotta run, going to meet with my pastor now. have to get all spiritual.. just kidding.
going from a 1 and 1/2 hour commute using 2 different cars and a train in chicago to driving alongside a nice plateau of rock and trees for most of my commute creates in a me a much happier mood... so much better in clearing the mind.
almost all moved in. just have my bedroom to complete. cant really do it until i get my computer desk (which i have to find one first). then my room and life will be complete :).
about the whole simplification process... it is going pretty well. i am choosing to put most of my things in the garage and then deciding at that point whether i should bring it in the house/use it. alot of my clutter will be out of site, which will help with me focus in on what's important. i still have too much furniture and it is pretty crappy, but hey, one thing at a time.
so, another of my goals in this moving process is to get more outside. i will tell you it is soo much easier to get outside when i am in Golden. everyday (at least the first) i see the foothills that literally surround me and i am refreshed. i do miss east colfax (most people would think that statement is funny, it is like saying they miss all the crap that comes from living in the city, but honestly, that is why i like cities... the crap) and all the 24 hour diners that come with the hustle and bustle. oh well. it was like 9:30 and it was completely (and i mean completely) quiet in my neighborhood, very weird. it is going to take some time to get used to that.
but, on the good side, i already ran into someone i know running in Golden on my first night at the house. that was really cool.
ok, gotta run, going to meet with my pastor now. have to get all spiritual.. just kidding.
Friday, June 24, 2005
buying my condo
yikes.
i am buying a condo in 3 hours. not quite nervous yet, but once i step out and go to the bank to write that 'huge' check, i will probably start to freak out a bit.
otherwise, it should go fairly smoothly. i looked at the pictures i took a couple weeks ago, and they were not *that* interesting. i will take better photos and post them in the next day or two.
cant wait to get a garage! though i lose my gear closet. i guess i will have to put something up in the garage for all my gear. i suppose that is the price i pay to move to golden. i am looking forward to building a couple shelves and hooks to keep my gear in the garage. i even have a place to put my open house signs.
gots to run to the bank.
i am buying a condo in 3 hours. not quite nervous yet, but once i step out and go to the bank to write that 'huge' check, i will probably start to freak out a bit.
otherwise, it should go fairly smoothly. i looked at the pictures i took a couple weeks ago, and they were not *that* interesting. i will take better photos and post them in the next day or two.
cant wait to get a garage! though i lose my gear closet. i guess i will have to put something up in the garage for all my gear. i suppose that is the price i pay to move to golden. i am looking forward to building a couple shelves and hooks to keep my gear in the garage. i even have a place to put my open house signs.
gots to run to the bank.
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Sunday, June 19, 2005
pop stand
father's day is soo weird. i think on one hand it is absolutely necessary to have a day where you can reflect on the father figure in your life. i suppose that comes with mixed emotions for a lot of people. on the other hand, it is really odd to have a day dedicated to 'father's.' it goes the same with all the 'personal' holidays we have, don't you think birthday's cover the 'thought' days for individuals?
we are such a comsumeristic society that the world of materials uses these days to slaughter us with this guilt to purchase junk for people we love. i don't think these holidays are used as effectively as they should be. it always seems like someone has to get a buck off these things.
i did think our church service tonight was pretty good (even though i really did not want to be there). there was quite a bit of discussion about father's and even the sermon was about God being a Father unlike the father's we have here on earth. the point of my church service (i think) was to get the idea that God does not take on any characteristics of any earthly fathers but is soo beyond the typical father role. the other point (i think again) is to say that it is some sort of blasphemy to react to God like how we react (or have reacted) to our fathers. i guess that makes sense, it is just weird having timely topical discussions around holidays i am not sure were even created for the right reasons... (research time) link_one, link_two. ok, so i was wrong, it was created for the right reasons. but why do these discussions always happen ONLY on these special holidays. you would think that it is important enough to be brought out on a more random basis (well i really like expository teaching, so the Father topic would be covered plenty if most churches taught int he expository way).
the good thing for me is that i did get to chat with my pops for a few minutes today. i suppose i probably would have done so anyway because it was about that time, but i got to anyway.
i wonder how many people really struggle on days like these?
man, my mind is all over the place. oh well.
we are such a comsumeristic society that the world of materials uses these days to slaughter us with this guilt to purchase junk for people we love. i don't think these holidays are used as effectively as they should be. it always seems like someone has to get a buck off these things.
i did think our church service tonight was pretty good (even though i really did not want to be there). there was quite a bit of discussion about father's and even the sermon was about God being a Father unlike the father's we have here on earth. the point of my church service (i think) was to get the idea that God does not take on any characteristics of any earthly fathers but is soo beyond the typical father role. the other point (i think again) is to say that it is some sort of blasphemy to react to God like how we react (or have reacted) to our fathers. i guess that makes sense, it is just weird having timely topical discussions around holidays i am not sure were even created for the right reasons... (research time) link_one, link_two. ok, so i was wrong, it was created for the right reasons. but why do these discussions always happen ONLY on these special holidays. you would think that it is important enough to be brought out on a more random basis (well i really like expository teaching, so the Father topic would be covered plenty if most churches taught int he expository way).
the good thing for me is that i did get to chat with my pops for a few minutes today. i suppose i probably would have done so anyway because it was about that time, but i got to anyway.
i wonder how many people really struggle on days like these?
man, my mind is all over the place. oh well.
Friday, June 17, 2005
Friday Afternoon
It's pretty hot here in Denver. I think it hit 90 today. Feels good though, you know the little sweat you get on your back as you drive around. That is summer.
The main thing that consumes me lately is my job. I suppose getting going in the real estate business seemed a lot easier when you talk with people or read books and what not. I have a lot of excuses like being new to Denver and not knowing too many people, but really it comes to just requiring myself to hit the pavement and get any deal I can until I make it in this business.
The other big thing that consumes me is my new house I am getting. I will be moving to Golden in a week or two and am really excited about it. I haven't started packing yet, but tonight sounds like a good night to start. I have to do laundry anyway... mmmm, laundry on a Friday night.
I will get pictures up for the place soon.
Let's see. I am going to pick up a roommate as well, and simplify my life. I mean it too. I have too much stuff and too much stuff going on. So, I meet with this guy, Bob, next Wednesday to see if we get along. He is an IT guy that works for some company that takes pictures from planes and formats them to the company and what not that desires to use the photographs. I guess it is kinda like maps.google.com satellite stuff. Sounds pretty cool
Anyway, that is pretty good for now. I have to go and walk some flyers around for my open houses this weekend.
Oh, my cousins are moving to D-town next week. I am really excited that they are moving out here. (Cousin and soon-to-be Cousin-in-law to be exact).
Holla
The main thing that consumes me lately is my job. I suppose getting going in the real estate business seemed a lot easier when you talk with people or read books and what not. I have a lot of excuses like being new to Denver and not knowing too many people, but really it comes to just requiring myself to hit the pavement and get any deal I can until I make it in this business.
The other big thing that consumes me is my new house I am getting. I will be moving to Golden in a week or two and am really excited about it. I haven't started packing yet, but tonight sounds like a good night to start. I have to do laundry anyway... mmmm, laundry on a Friday night.
I will get pictures up for the place soon.
Let's see. I am going to pick up a roommate as well, and simplify my life. I mean it too. I have too much stuff and too much stuff going on. So, I meet with this guy, Bob, next Wednesday to see if we get along. He is an IT guy that works for some company that takes pictures from planes and formats them to the company and what not that desires to use the photographs. I guess it is kinda like maps.google.com satellite stuff. Sounds pretty cool
Anyway, that is pretty good for now. I have to go and walk some flyers around for my open houses this weekend.
Oh, my cousins are moving to D-town next week. I am really excited that they are moving out here. (Cousin and soon-to-be Cousin-in-law to be exact).
Holla
A new leaf of sorts...
So I think I might start updating my life a bit with this thing. It is convenient but to do it regularly will be difficult. We will see how it goes...
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